Ingratitude

Recently, my friend, Mazi, posted a blog entry about gratitude and its counterpart- ingratitude. (link below) - We know that if we want to sow contentment in our lives rather than discontentment, we would be wise to ruminate on that which we are grateful for. But, she writes, "sometimes-oftentimes- the healthiest thing we can do is to admit 'I'm unthankful for this. I don't want this.'" By doing so, we are taking "the first step in surrendering those burdens [we] were never intended to solely bear."

These first few months here in Guatemala have been full of highs and lows. I either love something or hate it. I love that I can buy wonderful, fresh vegetables at insanely cheap prices. But I hate the fact that hooligans are constantly setting off fireworks at all hours of the day and night. I am grateful to have a safe place to live. But I am not grateful for the lack of hot water to wash dishes, clothes, and my hands. I am grateful for this opportunity to live in a different culture and be stretched in so many ways. But I sure as hell am not grateful for the homesickness I feel every day nor the fact that it is near-impossible to make friends here. I could go on, but you get the point.

I really appreciate Mazi's post, especially because her words give legitimacy to the reality of ingratitude. Admittedly, I am a pessimist, but I still feel terrible whenever I am less-than-pleased with my circumstances. But in the past few days, as I've contemplated Mazi's words, I have grown to believe that it is absolutely ok to not be stoked about everything that's going on. Of course, I don't want to be constantly looking for things to be annoyed about, nor do I want to keep a running list of things I'm not thankful for; but I appreciate the permission to admit that some things just suck.

I am grateful for a lot. But I am also ungrateful for a lot. And that's ok.

Voice Lessons for Today- Ungrateful